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Posts tagged ‘Kindness begins with me’

Apr 9

Do it for World Peace

In the past few weeks, I’ve noticed that stress levels are rising. Prospective clients are seeking services because they “can’t calm down to think,” and taking deep breaths is becoming essential to all of us.

I understand that tensions are high worldwide, and laughing isn’t what it used to be.

I’m going to suggest a few things to help people in this storm that we’re in. You don’t need to spend money to do these things—you only need to keep it simple.

  1. You are not alone in this! Everyone is feeling this stress, and at this point in time, community is more important that ever.
  2. Take a look out your window and notice that there is a world out there. Then go out and find something in nature to be grateful for. A fallen leaf, the sky, the sun, or a tree. We learned this as children in school, and as adults our societies have taken it from us. It is time we restore ourselves to what sanity we can!
  3. Hold those you love close. Cherish the ones you love. You may not have biological family. You may have a chosen family. Share time together.
  4. Share a meal with others where you all contribute to the bounty on the table. Connection builds new relationships.
  5. Kindness goes a long way. Kindness done with an open heart can touch another person in powerful ways. Pay it forward because the person you touch with kindness may need your gift.
  6. Love your fur friends? Take extra time to pet, walk, play with, and nurture them. They can, and do, sense your stress. They’ll love you unconditionally if you let them. OK, I know, dogs have masters, and cats have staff; they will seek you out. My cat did, and in that time of need she curled up like the lovely fur family member she was.
  7. Meditate.
  8. Discover exercise because your body will thank you, and it helps with the stress levels.
  9. Try “grounding” yourself. If you can, go outside and take your shoes off. Stand in the grass and let yourself sense the earth. Notice what happens.
  10. Take a nice warm bath or shower. Notice how the water feels on your skin.
  11. Smile and say hello to someone that you don’t know.
  12. Share a treat with someone.
  13. Set boundaries. Say no, because too much on your plate it not a sign of anything but not being able to set healthy boundaries for yourself and others.
  14. Practice taking mental health days. Time off from everything will create focus for yourself and enable you to return to your life relaxed and ready to meet the day.
  15. Create time to enjoy your favorite meal. Have lots of it! If you can, share the meal. It is your reward, and rewards are important.

It is my personal belief that when we care for ourselves, we also care for others, and in doing this self-care the world becomes a happier and healthier place. So, if for no other reason, do it for the betterment of the world we all live in.

Sep 18

In Hearts, Homes, and around the Table

When I was growing up and attending church as a child, there was a song we sang that had the line “kindness begins with me” in it. For much of my life, the act of simple kindness was not something I experienced. In the past few years, this has changed.

Since my fall in February that resulted in a broken femur, I’ve had the experience of kindness. It might also be possible that I’m more open to such acts now.

Maybe I’ve healed enough to allow kindness into my life. Maybe I’ve softened. Or maybe I have drawn people in that are kind. Whatever the reason for all of this is, I’m willing to accept it, and explore it.

As a disabled child and younger adult, I was faced with people who were less than understanding, and who didn’t understand my abilities and saw only what they felt I couldn’t do. Not having a fully abled body does not mean I am not fully capable. Being treated as such really hurts the soul.

I’m coming to believe that kindness is an attitude that we both learn and come to understanding within ourselves, and our own motivation for behaving in a kind manner.

There are some people who are naturally willing to give of themselves to others. The compassion switch gets turned on at a young age because they are raised to notice people in need. There are others who learn to offer help because they feel that is the proper thing to do. Another group of people I’ve come to know have a desire to give and serve others because they’ve developed gratitude and also thankfulness for what they’ve been given. The result is that they want others to enjoy the pleasures of life in simple ways.

I grew up in a household where we were taught to give to others because they had less. While that is all well and good, it builds an attitude of privilege that is not healthy.

Since my fall, I’ve encountered small acts of kindness that have caused me to grow into being kind because I want to see others receive from me what I can give to them. Sometimes I’m sneaky about it, and at other times I’m learning to offer and allow the offer to be accepted or rejected.

I think about things that have happened to me.

A recruiter could have but didn’t blow me off when I needed extra assistance to get onboard with a new contractor. A home health care worker made sure I had what I needed when I needed it so that I could work from my home. A nurse took the extra time to come in and show kindness when she could have been in someone else’s room. A guy paid for a meal before I could get my card out to pay for it. People didn’t complain when I was walking in unfamiliar areas and had to go slower. They chose to walk behind instead of pass me.

Kindness is a simple act: a smile, a friendly hello, the offer of a glass of water or other drink. Kindness is radical hospitality at its best.

Kindness comes from the heart, and it begins in homes. It begins around the table where we laugh, cry, share, and come to understandings that we haven’t experienced before.

Kindness is an art and a way of being. It begins with one person deciding that today they will go out and make their community a better place by doing something simple for others.

Kindness enables us to build stronger homes, communities, and lives, and it is not always easy but well worth the effort. It begins in our hearts.